Feeling Stuck? Here's How to Get Out of it
We’ve all been there.
At a place in our lives where we don’t want to be and don’t know how to get out of.
It’s probably unclear exactly how we got there. And the struggle to release ourselves feels like an insurmountable task.
When we’re in this state of mind, time seems to slow down and tick by. But in the blink of an eye, months or years have passed and we have nothing to show for it.
Have you ever felt like you needed to do something, but had no idea what?
You aren’t alone.
More than once in my life, I've found myself in this state of paralysis. Feeling totally stuck in a rut. Every time I went through one of these phases, the journey onward looked somewhat similar.
There is a way out, and these few simple strategies will help you get there.
When you are feeling stuck in life, look back at the times when things were going great for you. Even if they were decades apart, I guarantee there are some common denominators.
Once you identify what these are, you can start to make the transformation you need.
It’s time to get out of the valley and back to the summit.
Here’s how:
Find Inspiration Through Your Values
What's most important are your values in life and what is meaningful to you. If you can make those on autopilot, you will be set.
Your foundational values make you function at your absolute highest.
To be the best version of yourself, you must make them a priority in your life.
Everyone’s personal basics are different. They are as unique to you as your fingerprints.
We each learn, grow, and thrive in different ways. As the years go by, your personal basics evolve, transform, and become more refined. Even so, they will usually stay within the same general realm.
If you are asking how do you get unstuck, try first asking yourself what are the things that always make you feel good, no matter what?
Your personal basics are valuable to your mental health and overall wellbeing.
Here are some examples:
- Healthy lifestyle
- Creative pursuits
- Learning/challenging yourself
- Giving back/paying it forward
- Strong personal relationships
Find Meaning & Purpose
Any number of things can fall into the categories of your personal values, but what is important is that you find purpose and value in them.
Healthy lifestyle can mean exercise, eating right, or watching less TV. The purpose behind them? Being a good example for your children.
Creative pursuits could be art, writing, or gardening. The meaning? Having an outlet of creative expression.
Strong personal relationships can be taking family vacations or playing poker with your friends.
Once you determine what your personal basics are, you will see the pattern of how crucial a role these elements play in your life.
When you are nurturing your basic needs in some way, you will be more in alignment with what’s most important to you. This will keep you grounded and connected with yourself and the world around you.
On the contrary, if you are ignoring your personal basics, you’ll feel off and that something is missing. We start to see a decline in our health and happiness when we lose touch with the things that we value the most.
A disconnection from our true selves can lead to a stagnant feeling, and we’ll drift further down into that hazy, distant place.
These are the times when we feel stuck in life, need momentum, and start asking how do I get unstuck?
Take the time to hone in on what is most important to you, and make those things a priority in your life. Start with 10 minutes a day or one hour a week if you need to.
“If you take care of the small things, the big things take care of themselves. You can gain more control over your life by paying attention to the little things”
-Emily Dickinson
Let Go of What is No Longer Serving You
Take a look at the circumstances, environments, and relationships that surround you.
Without realizing it, sometimes we put ourselves in situations that are deflating us. As we progress through life, we attach ourselves to things that we deem important to us at the time.
When we evolve as individuals, many of the things that once served us are no longer supporting us on our journey.
To make forward progress in our lives, we need to regularly step back and do some self-evaluation. When you feel stuck in a rut and need some momentum, look around at who and what surrounds you.
When we were in school, we got progress reports and report cards throughout the year to show our progression. But we don’t have these luxuries in real life.
Without these indicators, how are we supposed to know when we are ready for the next level?
“In order to move forward, we have to break free from the past”
It is up to us to untangle ourselves when we are in situations that are arresting our development.
Whatever is holding you back, take notice and make a conscious decision to remove these influences from your life.
Recognize Opportunities to Help Yourself Get Unstuck
Every circumstance we face offers us an opportunity to become a better version of ourselves.
When we feel stagnant, it is easy to focus on the doom and gloom or monotony in our lives. But even in the most mundane situations, there are chances to learn and improve.
Remember that like attracts like, just like in biology.
If we are positive and putting good vibes into the Universe, that is what we are attracting into our lives. The same thing goes for opportunities.
Say you want to make a career change, but you don’t have the money for the course you need to take.
Instead of wallowing in your sorrow, why not try to look for opportunities in nontraditional ways?
How about going to networking events & making connections with people in that industry?
You could reach out to people you know who might be able to give you ideas on how to get started. Could you offer to trade your services to shadow a successful person you admire?
“Nothing is more expensive than a missed opportunity”
Opportunities are everywhere, and when we close ourselves off to them we close off a world of possibility.
Start recognizing and taking opportunities that surround you. Something you view as minuscule could start a rumbling that creates an avalanche of success.
Get Out of Your Comfort Zone to Get Out of a Rut
We all have one: a cocoon of comfort that keeps us warm and fuzzy inside. But it also keep us idle.
Having a safe space is healthy, but stepping outside of it is critical for our personal growth. It helps us break free from circumstances that are holding us back.
Several times a week, try and get out of your comfort zone and challenge yourself in a way that you normally wouldn’t. It doesn’t have to be something monumental like skydiving away your fear of heights.
It can be as simple as eating out alone, going to a new exercise class, or talking to a stranger.
“A comfort zone is a great place, but nothing ever grows there”
Small incremental changes can have massive impact on your life. They get us in front of people who we can learn from and affords us opportunities we may have not otherwise seen.
Start to Make Movements and You Are No Longer Stuck
When we are true to ourselves and stay connected with our core values, we feel better about our existence. This has a paramount effect on every area of our lives.
Our feelings of self-worth and confidence skyrocket when we can clearly see the path in front of us.
If you are feeling stuck, then make a commitment to start making small, consistent movements.
Even just a 1% change every day can completely overhaul your life in a few months.
Taking small steps in the right direction will get you onto the path that you are destined to be.
Don't settle for what is when you know that you are destined for more.
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by 2-time NY Times Bestseller John Assaraf
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